There is a significant connection between how we spend our energy and our mental health. Imagine that each person has a set amount of energy “units” (which we will call “spoons”) to use daily. Ideally, we aim to have at least one spoon left by the end of each day. If we exhaust our spoons early, we might feel drained, anxious, irritable, or even depressed.
Worse, if we end up in a “spoon deficit,” our sleep may suffer, impacting our energy and reducing the number of spoons we have for the next day. So, how can we be mindful of how we spend our spoons each day?
A Little Math for Energy Management
Let’s say the average person has about 100 spoons to use each day. Different tasks consume varying amounts of spoons depending on their type, length, and difficulty—and, importantly, the individual. For instance, as a therapist with two decades of experience, I might use four spoons to see a client for an hour because I’m comfortable in this role. However, an hour of accounting (something I find less enjoyable and have less experience in) could cost me 15 spoons. Knowing how many spoons different activities require helps in planning energy use throughout the day.
Factors to Consider in Energy Conservation
- Activity Cost: The first factor is knowing how many spoons a specific activity will likely require. Understanding this helps you gauge whether you need to adjust your schedule or prepare for more challenging tasks.
- Activity Length and Breaks: The next factor is how long you’re engaging in a particular task. If I see clients back-to-back, my energy expenditure for each client may increase as I go. By taking a 30-minute break, however, I can keep the energy cost stable and avoid extra spoon depletion.
- Activities That Recharge You: Some activities can “give back” spoons. If you’re running low but still have a busy evening, choose something that revitalizes you—maybe it’s a walk, a conversation with a friend, or listening to music. It’s really worth making time to do this type of recharging activity so that you can avoid being in the red at the end of the day
Handling Days That Cost Too Many Spoons
There will inevitably be days where, even with planning, your spoon count won’t cover the demands of the day. We can sometimes tell when these types of days are coming because there is a sense of dread or overwhelm the night before. For instance, if I feel like I am behind on accounting and feel pressured to complete five hours of accounting in a day (which could easily cost 75 spoons), I know I’m likely to burn out. In these cases, spreading tasks over several days is often wiser than trying to tackle high-energy tasks at once.
Trading Spoons with Others
Sometimes, the solution is to trade activities or responsibilities. For example, if I have a friend who excels in accounting and hates yardwork, I might offer to mow her lawn (which I do not find demanding) if she can lend a hand with my Quickbooks. This trade allows us both to save spoons. This “spoon-trading” approach can be especially helpful with roommates, family members, or co-workers, allowing each person to focus on tasks that take less energy.
100 Spoons Aren’t Always Guaranteed
While we assume a baseline of 100 spoons, factors like physical illness, anxiety, depression, or other challenges can reduce daily spoon counts significantly. If you’re starting with fewer spoons, increased mindfulness is needed to manage your energy. This might mean doing more activities that recharge you or asking for additional support. The goal is to gradually rebuild your energy reserves, adding spoons each day until you have enough to create the type of day you envision.
Final Thoughts
Managing energy isn’t just about getting through the day—it’s an important tool for self-care and recognizing our own needs. By understanding the “spoon” model, we can become more aware of how activities impact us and start making choices that help sustain our mental and physical health. Sometimes, the best way to care for ourselves is by setting boundaries, taking breaks, or asking for help.
